Rooted in Jesus Grace

The word  love  gets thrown around a lot in Christian spaces—but sometimes, what’s called “love” is actually something much more dangerous. Many victims of abuse—especially emotional, psychological, or spiritual abuse—have been harmed not only by their abuser but also by their church. Why? Because well-meaning (and sometimes not-so-well-meaning) Christians have misused the idea of “love” to pressure victims into silence, guilt, and ongoing harm. These lies often sound holy. They’re framed as obedience, forgiveness, or faithfulness. But beneath the surface, they distort Scripture, protect abusers, and retraumatize those already wounded. It’s time to name the lies. Because real love—God’s love—is never manipulative. It doesn’t demand victims keep suffering. And it certainly doesn’t silence the truth. Here are  4 lies the church tells victims in the name of love —and the truth that sets people free. Lie #1: “Love Always Stays” Victims are often told that if they  really...

There’s a myth that’s been quietly poisoning church culture for generations. It doesn’t come from Scripture, but it’s been preached from pulpits, whispered in prayer groups, and implied in countless conversations. It’s the myth of the  bitter woman —the idea that any woman who speaks up, sets boundaries, or challenges injustice must be harboring resentment, rebellion, or an unhealed heart. This myth has silenced survivors. It’s protected abusers. And it’s distorted the biblical call to justice into a caricature of female emotionalism. It’s time to name it. It’s time to expose it. And it’s time to bury it once and for all. How the “Bitter Woman” Trope Silences Truth-Telling When a woman finally gathers the courage to speak up—whether about abuse, toxic leadership, or a harmful culture—she often meets a familiar wall:  “She’s just bitter.” That one phrase does a lot of work. It casts doubt on her credibility. It redirects attention away from the issue she’s raising. And it subtl...

Leadership in the church is a sacred trust — a high calling to shepherd God’s people with humility, care, and faithfulness. Yet, throughout Scripture, we see that this calling can be gravely abused. Two powerful biblical passages, Ezekiel 34 and Mark 10, issue scathing rebukes of leaders who fail their flocks, exposing the consequences of self-serving, negligent leadership and revealing God’s heart for true shepherding. Ezekiel 34: A Godly Rebuke of Failed Shepherds Ezekiel 34 stands as one of the clearest Old Testament condemnations of corrupt spiritual leaders. In this chapter, God, speaking through the prophet Ezekiel, indicts the shepherds of Israel — the kings, priests, and leaders — for their egregious failure to care for His people, the sheep of His pasture. God’s accusation is blunt and devastating: “Woe to the shepherds of Israel who only take care of themselves! Should not shepherds take care of the flock? You eat the curds, clothe yourselves with the wool and slaughter the c...